You’ll have to forgive me for being late to the party (and starting off with a really bad joke) but when busy with kids, keeping up with which parents are invoicing who for a no-show isn’t necessarily on my list of priorities when teething and weaning are hitting my own headlines.
Curiosity got the better of me today, and I decided to delve into what the whole thing was about, and why this young lad had come home from school with an invoice in between his lunchbox and his homework demanding the princely sum of £15.95 or else!
It turns out he missed a 5th birthday party, which consisted of some skiing, some tobogganing and a gourmet meal of reconstituted chicken nuggets and dry chips. A bargain at £15.95 per head don’t you think?
So, the story goes, the family had given some indication their son was attending the party. Unfortunately he ended up not going, and as the invite had been misplaced they were unable to notify the party arrangers that their son wouldn’t be attending. Unfortunate, but these things happen.
So what should follow, but an invoice is issued to the family of the non-attendee demanding the fee for his place at the party. Now, myself, I would have moved on. It’s a shame when a kid doesn’t make it to a party for whatever reason, but there’s no need to make a big song and dance about it is there! A mother who issues an invoice for a child who hasn’t attended their sons birthday party, is a woman with some issues. Surely there are bigger fish to fry.
But lets go back to the party. This was the most expensive party package that the venue offered. Not just any old reconstituted chicken nuggets! It was a skiing party, do 5 year olds really want skiing parties? And if they do, do they really need the most expensive one? Has the party industry gone mad taking with it parents desire to make sure their children have the very best of everything, no matter what the cost?
Parents are expected to put on lavish parties, invite the whole class so no one is offended, and don’t forget the party bag. The quality of any party comes down to the contents of the party bag. Just how many things can you squeeze into a little Ben 10 bag. Don’t worry, there will be extra room if you put the cake in a serviette. I admit it, I have been that parent!
It’s all got out of control. It’s perfectly OK to say to a child you can have 5 friends to your party if that’s all you are able to cater for. It’s more than OK to turn down their demands for a private party at Disneyland Paris as we aren’t all called Beckham, and there is no harm in learning you won’t always get invited to every party ever, as life’s just not like that. As for the invoice, I think if it were me I would donate the equivalent amount to charity on behalf of the birthday boy and his family.
I too would donate said amount to charity, with a huffy note to the parents telling them so.
How ridiculous! What values are we teaching our children, when they be spoilt rotten at such a young age?!
30yrs ago, kids started this off with the whole ‘designer trainers’ thing, which led to bullying of kids from less well-off families, and parents feeling the need to put themselves into debt to prevent that bullying. And of course, the emotional blackmail of ‘ If you loved me, you’d buy them for me’.
I am saddened that matters have escalated since then – though not surprised, as the timescale kind of implies that parents now were the ones with the trainers!
Where will it end? Will kids take their parents to court for not providing the demanded treat? I throw my hands up in despair.
It has become ridiculous and parents feel such pressure to keep up with it all. It has been a sad situation made very worse without people talking to each other like human beings to resolve it
Not to say I agree with sending an invoice, but I don’t think anyone should gloss over the fact that the parents that double booked were extremely rude.
Someone has paid for their kid to go out and have some fun with friends. They have said yes. And then realised they’d actually rather go and see granny (someone presumably they see often). I don’t think you can discount that as something that happens, it was a conscious decision and very rude as well. If you say you attend, you attend, unless you are ill or you need to visit someone in a hospital.
Amazed what a response the whole news story got, everyone seems to have strong opinions on the matter one way or another 🙂
I think you have made some great points, but I’m not sure we are getting the full picture from the edited highlights. Maybe the grandparents had an event arranged that also cost money. MAybe they were ill. It difficult to know what the issue was. It’s sad that these parents haven’t been able to resolve the issue without going to the national press, and I feel sorry for the kids at the end of the day. Thanks for stopping by!
This news weirded me out! I mean making them pay?#pocolo
It is strange. I’m not sure why it’s got to this point. I do see that it could be perceived as rude that the boy didn’t attend, but I’d like to know more about all sides of the story before I maker that judgement. Thanks for your comment Merlinda
Lately the pressure on having a great kids ´birthday party has increased. So I am not surprised that someone wanted to throw a ski party… To whether that’s the birthday party the little boy wished for it, or enjoyed it? Don´t know. Was it worth it to spend the money on that event? That´s debatable… Even I, on my lo first birthday party have to admit that pushed it a bit far (but hosted a great party nevertheless 😉 ). But asking for money because one child missed it? That is taking it way too far think…. Even if they confirmed the attendance. If you want to throw a major party, do it, but handle its costs wisely. You should never ask some compensation because a child failed to attend the event. That reminds me of a bride that complaint about the wedding gift, because it wouldn’t compensate the expense she had per person…. Very tacky.
I think tacky is a good word! What isn’t clear is why the parents who through the party invoiced the family. Was it because they had stretched themselves too far or because they felt there was a point to be made. I wish I knew the answer to that one. Thanks for stopping by
I am geniunely shocked at this story. One – that the parent sent the invoice (the ski centre said they would have given them credit at the bar or extra goes on rides) and two – that the party was even booked. Kids parties are getting more and more ridiculous – my three will have what I had as kids – some friends round for a tea party and a few games!!!
#brilliantblogposts
Thought it was a silly way to prove a point and the ensuing threat of legal action a bit of joke but I appreciate the frustration just wasn’t the right way of going about it. Like the charity idea, you are wise Zena. Thanks for linking up to #brilliantblogposts
Thanks Vicki! I agree, it does seem a very silly way of going about it. I have always appreciated my children being asked to parties, and have always responded, so I’m not sure why the communication fell down here. I suspect there is more to it. Am I wise, I think there is a whole other debate there to be had! Thanks for stopping by 🙂 Zx
The whole thing is ridiculous! Who books a skiing party for 4 year olds anyway….lol
It strikes me as a bit over the top! By the time they were 10 it would be overland tank experiences or something equally as outlandish. Thanks for commenting Zx
I am so with you on the birthday parties for kids thing. Grace had a build-a-bear party for a couple of years and the party bags were the bears! It also meant you could set your own budget. This year she went to a soft play which, to me, was a complete bargain. It was £9.95 a head which included food, a gift for Grace and all the party bags. They also entertained the kids. All I had to do was bring the cake. Thank you for linking to #PoCoLo x
That sounds much more reasonable Vic. I’m thinking of going to our local soft play, which is also a social enterprise and supports the local community. It starts at £6.50 p/h and the kids love it Zx
I must say I was taken aback, as a child of the 70s where all the birthday parties were low key affairs round each others’ houses, when I realised we are actually supposed to hire out venues and so on, especially in London, where £15 a head seems extremely reasonable. We have decided that ours get parties like that for significant birthdays only.
Although, on the upside, no clearing up.
Still, the whole invoice thing is clearly OTT. I would just have made a mental note never to invite that child to anything again.
#PoCoLo
I think the invoice is ridiculous, but I guess the parents of the little boy should have done the courteous thing and called to say they wouldn’t make it. Thanks for linking up to the #BinkyLinky
I feel sorry for the kids, personally. They are the ones who are going to suffer as a result of their parents’ petty squabbles. #brilliantblogposts
I can’t imagine ever charging someone for not attending a party. But then I also find it hard to understand parents who can’t be bothered to let me know if they can or can’t make it to a party in the first place. I don’t get the whole ‘massive party’ thing either. Until this last year we’ve just had a special family day out as Monkey’s party. For his 5th party we took him and some friends ten pin bowling. The food was provided which meant I could enjoy watching my son and his friends having a great time. I made the cake and created my own party bags, job done and everyone was happy without it breaking the bank. The really nice thing was the venue didn’t charge me for the little girl who couldn’t come as she’d been sent home poorly from school – these things happen and they made their money back in the drinks the parents bought.