5 Ways To Build Your Confidence

I went to a conference recently to speak to a group of Female Entrepreneurs about how to blog.  I haven’t spoke in front of an audience like that for a couple of years, so I was feeling a little nervous and lacking in confidence as I boarded the train to Birmingham that day, I can tell you.

It was definitely a time when I had to build up my confidence to be able to address this group of successful business women, and there were a few tricks I pulled out of the bag that really helped me out.

I guess we all have times when we are feeling out of our comfort zone, and could do with a little boost, so I thought I’d share my tips for getting through these particular challenges.  I really believe confidence is something we can influence if we put our minds to it, and it can really help to calm the nerves if we are going into a new or unfamiliar situation.

How To Build Your Confidence

1. Being Prepared Will Help Your Confidence

Because I was going to be giving a talk, having a presentation to work from really helped me out.  I just used bullet points to prompt me with what I wanted to say, but it made such a difference organising my thoughts before had.

It gave me a tool to help me have a few run through’s about what I was going to say, and it stopped me rambling and repeating myself.  I’ve been to so many presentations where the speaker has tried to deliver the talk off the cuff, and has ended up reiterating the same point because they haven’t been prepared.

2. When Did You Last Feel Confident

I’ve talked about how powerful memories can be before in helping how we behave in the present, and you can pretty much apply this tactic to anything.

On the way to the event, I remembered a time when I was delivering training that was really successful.  I used to get excellent feedback for the courses I ran, so I pictured myself back in one of those sessions.  I thought about how I felt, what kind of body language I used and my presentation style and it really helped give me a boost before arriving at the conference.

3. Don’t Dwell On The Negatives

There were moments when I could feel negative thoughts creep in.  ‘Why have I agreed to this’ I thought, ‘Who’s going to want to here what you have to say’ said the little voice in my head.

As soon as I started to hear these ideas, i stopped them from gaining momentum and I chose to focus on the positives instead.  It was going to be a great experience for me, and as soon as I got back into it I knew I’d enjoy it.  We are in control of what we think and if we make the effort to think positively we can chase the negative demons away and start to feel more confident instantly.

4. Don’t Worry If Something Goes Wrong

Things happen, things go wrong from time to time and sometimes we make mistakes.  I did my best to prepare for things like my presentation not working by having a printed version, as that was something I could control, but sometimes things happen that are out of out control.

If something had of gone wrong, it wouldn’t have been the end of the world, and it wasn’t going to put me of doing the presentation.  If I’d of made a mistake somewhere along the line, as long as I learnt from it I’m sure everyone else would have forgiven me too.

5. Give Yourself A Huge Pat On The Back

I’m really proud of myself for the talk I did at the conference, and I think most of the people really enjoyed it.  Those that didn’t, then I guess it wasn’t for them and that’s OK too.

I felt like I delivered something useful for those that were engaged with it, and it was lovely to speak to the delegates who wanted to know more afterwards.  It was just such a shame that I was up last and didn’t have a lot of time to hang around after the event.  Those that did speak to me were really positive, and that has made me feel much more confident about the thought of speaking like this in the future.

I pulled it off, so well done me!  And well done to you too if you have stepped outside of your comfort zone recently, I hope it’s helped you feel more confident too.  Practising tricks like these when ever your not feeling so confident about yourself will help you grow your confidence no end and pretty soon you’ll change your behaviour without even realising it to grow into the confident person you’ve always wanted to me.

Zena Goldman

Zena Goldman is a UK based travel, family & lifestyle blogger who left her 9-5 job behind in the not-for-profit sector to follow her creative dreams and enjoy a more flexible family life. She began writing Zena’s Suitcase in 2011 and shares the holidays and adventures she goes on with (and without) her 2 young daughters. She wishes her son would join them more often but he’s carving out his own dreams now and enjoying university life. Since beginning Zena’s Suitcase she has worked with a number of brands and also has a regular monthly feature in the ASDA Good Living Magazine feature, ‘Ask The Expert’ where she shares helpful parenting tips. In 2018 she was also a finalist in the prestigious BIBs Awards for Social Media.

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19 Discussion to this post

  1. Kim Carberry says:

    I hope it went well….Speaking in front of people is my idea of hell. I am so shy. I need to take notice of this and be more confident x
    Kim Carberry recently posted…Project 365 – Week 27My Profile

  2. Notmyyearoff says:

    I know confidence comes with time but these are very good tips everyone should keep reminding themselves of. About 12 years ago I used to want to throw up each time I had to speak in front of people. I can wing it now but it took years and years to get there 🙂
    Notmyyearoff recently posted…AnniversariesMy Profile

    • Zena says:

      You can build on it can’t you. It’s lovely to read a success story like that and I’m so pleased you think these are good tips. Thanks for stopping by 🙂

  3. Jenni - Odd Socks and Lollipops says:

    Oh I am too shy – I don’t like being in big groups never mind talking in front of them! You are one brave lady and these are fantastic tips! I am definitely going to put them in to practice.

  4. Zena says:

    Thanks Jenni! There was a time when I would have crumbled, but with some work I’ve been able to improve it. I’d love to hear how you get on using these ideas

  5. Been a while since I stood up to speak in public. Don’t know if I could cope now. Yikes!
    VaiChin @RamblingThroughParenthood recently posted…5 Tips to Beautiful Summer SkinMy Profile

  6. Pamela Risk says:

    I can & do speak in front of people-work related but I cannot go to a supermarket on my own, daft eh, the thought of it makes me feel sick & anxious ….geeez ….anyway great tips above & well done you !!!

  7. Ickle Pickle says:

    Go Girl! I HATE speaking in public – I really force myself to do it – and once I get started I think I actually enjoy it – I just get so nervous before hand! Kaz xx
    Ickle Pickle recently posted…University FREE Printable Checklist & TipsMy Profile

  8. Mummy Tries says:

    You look awesome up there hon, and I just know you will have been brilliant. Great tips too… I have a feeling that a bit of public speaking might be on my horizon, so I’ll be referring back to this post 🙂 xx
    Mummy Tries recently posted…Just when things couldn’t get any worse, they got MUCH betterMy Profile

  9. Great post. We are having a very small wedding because the thought of so many people staring at me is really nerve wracking to the point we may just elope! I will try your tips and hopefully so at least families can attend and I will have to show Mr Firstooth, also low-self confidence when it comes to speaking. I hope your speech went successfully you deserve a pat on the back 🙂

  10. I’ve always struggled with confidence and speaking to people, opening up, relaxing in public etc. so read with interest, I shall try and put the tips into action, thanks you.
    Ashley Beolens recently posted…Dad Post Of The Week 3My Profile

  11. Totally agree, preparation is so important. Fail to prepare, prepare to fail!
    Hope it went well 🙂
    Mum’s Hideout recently posted…Smallprint Abu DhabiMy Profile

  12. Beth says:

    Great tips. I get so nervous talking in front of a big crowd. x
    Beth recently posted…I Miss ThailandMy Profile

  13. These are useful tips. I’m not so keen on speaking in public, although I’m better than I used to be – I remember having to give a presentation at university and my voice wouldn’t stop shaking. Cringe! Now it’s something I do every day, on a smaller scale, as a teacher. When I used to teach adults and teenagers I would feel nervous before every class.
    Thanks for hosting #MyFavouritePost
    Ruth @Mummy and the Mexicans recently posted…Making mistakesMy Profile

  14. I can understand why you were a bit nervous doing this! Hope it went well. Really good tips, especially the one about if things go wrong, it’s not the end of the world 🙂 Thanks for hosting #myfavouritepost
    Debbie
    http://www.myrandommusings.blogspot.com
    Random Musings recently posted…Why I Blog AnonymouslyMy Profile

  15. Wow I have always been very shy. It is my worth nightmare to speak in front of people but I had to do it several times when I was studying law. Lots of my final exams were in front of a jury and with public so it was hard. At the end I always managed and felt happy about it. It is just the minutes before a presentation that is very difficult and you are really nervous. Thanks for your tips and also thanks for hosting, xx
    A Moment With Franca recently posted…June FavouritesMy Profile

  16. Great advice in this post. I always seem to be the one that people say “go on you do it” as I come across as pretty confident. My problem is that I talk too quickly and therefore run out of breath because I am not breathing in properly. It is a nightmare as it then makes me sound really nervous and I feel like I am going to burp as I start gulping air. I have to remind myself to breathe and I make a bit of a joke about it when I am up there. Having a “plant” in the audience to smile at you as you do your presentation helps, as does feeling good in your outfit choice – high heels area always my boost! #MyFavouritePost
    Harry’s Honest Mummy recently posted…Pooping SandcastlesMy Profile

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